Turning 54

Ridiculous! Time flies. Things have changed. The new job is now on year 4. I teach accounting instead of music now. As I teach I learn, I learn more about accounting, more about teaching, more about myself and more about how to keep balance. The children are out of the house, one married, only one more to graduate from college. The parents are all thriving but needing me more. I renamed my blog since being in need of a job is no longer an immediate issue. Hostalevista represents the status of my gardens. The hosta is the predominant plant here. I continue to divide it every year which has begun to give me more plants than I have planting space.

Scott has traveled to the Czech Republic to record his Encomiums. Alena has been to Japan for a year for her junior year of school. Jessica spent 2 years in Montana and another year in West Virginia for VISTA. But after a year of job searching, she has found a new job at Kent State. Alena also spent 5 weeks on a riverboat cruise...not the best experience of a lifetime. Pearce is now a computer programming major. Joshua continues to look for better jobs. He performs in Dayton and Springfield. But even better, he is in his second year at OSU working on a DMA.

My parents are in the throes of old age. Dad suffers from Alzheimers and neither of them drive now. I try to visit them about once a month. Mom's eyes are bad but she manages the finances, the meds, the appointments and bridge. She inspires me more now than ever in her life. Her attitude as an old woman continues to draw people in. The things that always used to bug me are the same things that brings her strength in surviving now. Scott's mother is a survivor of cancer after a long year's struggle.

People have died, fallen ill, married, graduated, been promoted at school. Lately, I am immersed in a challenge with a student that bullies and threatens. Where should I have drawn the line of tolerance? How do you continue now that the trust is gone? Why does the university have no policies in place to tackle this sensitive issue? It has not been a week yet, but the parties in play seem to be flailing. Ultimately, the dean of my college will provide the solution for handling the logistics, since we are midway through the term. This becomes more complicated when I think of applying for tenure. I don't want to jeopardize it, but I want to do the right thing even if tenure is at risk.

What I know.

The half century mark...this should not be a grim milestone. Those of us who have turned 50 have much experience to share with our kin and in the workplace. We know our strengths and our weaknesses. We understand passion. We have been humbled. And, we have succumbed to numerous middle-age crises.

I am a parent, a teacher, a performer, a gardener, a activist, a lover, and a student. And for the first time, I am now a blogger. The inspiration comes from the movie, Julie and Julia. I don't pretend to be able to be so engaging. I have the purpose of declaring what my strengths are so as to find meaningful work in my new career. I have switched from being a musician to desiring to be an accountant. I am sure there is many an accountant that would claim I have that backwards. What musician would want to leave the arts for something so sterile? It all depends on which side of the fence you are viewing the situation. Artists tend to be underemployed. My passion has been music; but now I have family, they don't settle next door. I wish to be able to afford small trips to visit. I hope to have steady work for 12 months instead of just 8 months (the usual for adjunct professors). More later. It is time for me to get my heart checked. Age!